If Every Porkchop Were Perfect...
Status: Completed
Rating: E
Posted: 04/12/2020
Finished: 02/15/2015
Word count: 173
Characters: Steven Universe, Greg Universe
Steven's dad was driving on the highway with his stupid, dumb, magical, dorky son Steven Universe. "Heh," he said as they drove past a sign with a picture of a hot dog. "You know Steven," he said. "If every porkchop were perfect-"
"We wouldn't have hot dogs!" Steven cut in. "Hmm..." His dad said, eyeing Steven. "If every Hershey bar were perfect-"
"We wouldn't have M&M's!"
"If every chicken was perfect-"
"We wouldn't have Chicken McNuggets!"
"If every potato was perfect-"
"We wouldn't have french fries!"
"AHHHHHHH!" Steven's dad yelled, throwing his hands up. "You let go of the wheel dad!" Steven pointed out. Steven liked to be helpful. Their van spun off the highway, crashing into a tree in the middle of the forest. "ARE YOU HAPPY NOW STEVEN?!?" His dad yelled. "YOU MADE ME SPIN OFF THE HIGHWAY AND CRASH INTO A TREE RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FRICKEN FOREST!!!"
"It's OK dad!" Steven said. "Because if every porkchop were perfect, we wouldn't have hot dogs!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" His dad screamed.